On my 65th Birthday…To the girl I once was…

**Originally published in September of 2023 

Writing to a girl I once knew…the “me’ that was 16 years old…

Dear Friend,

I got this idea to write to you after seeing a woman I admire write a letter similar to this as part of her MasterClass. So this is a way of just telling a story-a story of my life and how it works out-to you, a young girl who is so passionate and afraid and emotional.


I had always wanted to find this magic formula to know when I was going to be ‘all grown up!” And that moment never arrives…there is no real cut-off point to tell you when things are going to change for you. Some people are born with an’old soul.’ You can see it and hear it in their voices and just feel their wisdom exuding from every pore of their being. They are comfortable in their own skin and they know what they want and they work hard to get it. Those characters are surprisingly rare.


You were not born with an ‘old soul’ You have a vulnerability that is both touching and worrisome. You will find wisdom later in the words of your parents that you didn’t know existed at the time. And you will be hurt by some, and you will have moments of great joy and happiness in your life. That is all just a part of life and you will endure.


But it’s never going to be easy, and things don’t turn out the way you think they might. And that is not a bad thing! You will find that the road you’ve paved for yourself is often the road not taken by others. That is a perilous and sometimes a lonely journey for you.


But you will also find that forging courage and steeling yourself for challenges you face is one of the triumphs for the things you endure. We all face roads of uncertainty in our lives. But you will be able to weather the storm later in life by having come through the fires at some point.


None of this is going to change who you are. You will find that you may even bring comfort to others as they grow older and face challenges. That is the triumph of the will. But just know that you must keep as your lodestar the factor of love in your life. Don’t give up on people and things that cause you pain or sorrow at some point.


In the end, you will triumph as a better person. You will become a stronger person with the will to endure.  The stronger the spirit of a person that shines through, in my opinion, will indicate the greatest chance for happiness and joy as they grow older. You will know some people who possess great wisdom already. Seek them out and cherish all the moments of your life when you are at peace. Never stop learning in your life!


And know you will be a better person for it in the end. From that young girl who is 16, looking in a mirror and wishing she was someone else who was smarter and prettier and funnier…that is the person you are becoming and the woman you will be someday. Cherish your life and embrace the happiness you find along the way.


Nothing will change in the facts of your life because I have written to you. But I would love to impart the things I know now that I wish I knew then. I can say that your driving desire to write will never be extinguished. And you will fulfill that lifelong dream of being a writer and an Author. That is not the beginning and the end of your dreams, but life’s will and desires may become a self-fulfilling prophesy. You had a strong desire and your dreams came true…


Like Cinderella, that doesn’t mean that ‘happy-ever-after’ comes with it! You will need to persevere and not think about giving up. Too often, that has been your own self-fulfilling prophecy of doom. I think I CAN”T and I WON”T and I never DO!

Your dreams will take a lot of courage to see them through. And life is never easy for most of us. It means we always struggle and we work hard to try and find success.


Success is something that you will redefine often during the course of your life and your career. And in the end, when so many of your dreams have come true, you will come to the realization that you have been able to succeed in the end in spite of your own insecurities and fear of failure.


You will even find a code of honor in that term: “Grand Failures!” It is one of the things you write about in life. And in the end, nothing is a sure thing other than the fact that you need to face your fears and own your own failings and weaknesses. At the end of the day,, the stronger spirit will prevail. In the end, you can be assured that your own life has been a life worth living. And you have lived to tell the tale!

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